Mommy Has Needs Too

Yes, she does. We do not become a needless woman capable of giving 100% of the time and receiving 0% of the time when we give birth. Nope, sorry, hope you weren't expecting that. 

Fact is, I need sleep. I need to shower regularly. I need time to myself, time with my girlfriends, time with the Lord, time at the gym. I'm not being high maintenance or unreasonable by needing these things. I'm just being... Me. Do I need to learn to not throw fits when things don't work out and I don't get these things? Yes. Do I need to grow in Christ-likeness and learn to become more selfless and attentive to the needs of my husband and daughter before my own? You bet. But somewhere in the past few decades there seems to have developed this mentality among white, Christian women that to be a good wife and mother (a Christ-loving wife and mother in particular) that you have to forget about all your needs, pretend they don't exist, and live only to serve your children and husband. 

Well I'm sorry, but I'm calling shenanigans on that. I am a wonderful work of God's creation - and He created me to glorify Him in everything I do. This includes how I look, how I take care of my body, how I relate to other women, and how I use my gifts (and my gifts are not limited to keeping a small child alive and happy and maneuvering pots an pans on a stove.) Check out the ever-referenced Proverbs 31 woman. Obviously she is giving priority to her family, but she's doing a whole heck of a lot of other things. Lets take a look:

--"she dresses herself with strength and makes her arms strong" v.17 (CrossFit anyone?)

--"she considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard" v.16 (that's not a backyard garden people, that's called a business decision)

--"her clothing is fine linen and purple" v.22 (we're not talking oversized polos and ankle socks here!)

--"she opens her mouth with wisdom and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue" v.26 (which I bet she put to good use with these "maidens" frequently in this passage, not just with her husband and children)

There's a lot more. Read the passage and consider it for yourself. Obviously none of us are going to be the perfect Proverbs 31 woman, but there are principles at play in this passage that, in my opinion, have been ridiculously downplayed in modern Christian culture. This woman is reaching her full potential within the context of her family and without it. God is glorified in the many facets of her character that she has sought to master - her business sense, her relationships, her physical appearance, the physical condition of her body - not only in the way she cares for her family. 

So ladies, get out there. Be the amazon woman God made you to be. Don't ignore the call on your life to glorify Him in all you do. Look pretty. Get your butt to the gym. Explore the things that interest you. Develop your gifts and strengths and use them to glorify the God who gave them to you. By His grace as through His power, we will be able to do all that without forgetting our children at the grocery store and while managing to get dinner on the table every night. You know why? Because its what He created us to do. 

{rant over}

Divine Wisdom + Earthly Parenting

There are literally dozens of things that I love about being a mom. All of the clichés about it are true - "being a mom is the best job in the world", "there's no love like a mother's love", etc. One particular, non-cliché thing about parenting though is this: my Heavenly Father reveals Himself in wonderful, unique ways every day through me taking care if baby B. I feel like He has taken into account that right now I am busier and less organized than I have ever been in my life, and therefore He has wisely, graciously, mercifully chosen to display His glory to me daily through the things I am busy with. 

One of my new tasks is taking Brooklyn to the doctor regularly and making sure she gets all of her shots when she is supposed to. This is not fun. The last time we went she had to get a shot in each thigh and, believe me, she was not happy about it. She went from smiling to bright red-faced silent screaming in about half a second each time. Then I cried because my poor baby was so unhappy (Chris found that amusing, ha.) I picked her up immediately and rocked her and she quieted and was happy again after a pretty short period of time. I didn't like seeing her in pain from the shots but I also know its much better for her I feel the pain of a quick shot than it is for her to get something like measles or whooping cough. So I let her experience the pain of the shot and make sure that I'm right there to comfort her while she deals with that trauma. Isn't that so like our Father, though? How He let's us endure some hardships that we hate, things that make us cry out in pain/anger/frustration, etc. But He doesn't stop them, doesn't take them away.  Just like I am wiser and smarter than Brooklyn (for now), God is wiser and smarter than me. He has a plan, a reason for every bit of discomfort we go through in life. Nothing is accidental or out of His control, nothing is unnecessary. And when we're struggling He is always right there, ready and waiting to comfort us. This comfort is not the same as taking away the pain - but it reminds us of His love and constant presence. It soothes our soul in a way nothing else, not even the removal of the trial, could do. 

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." -Jeremiah 29:11

May I be faithful to remember these lessons, teach them to my children and, above all, learn to rejoice in every circumstance.