Mommies & Tummies

Freaky thing about the second and third trimester is that what I'm eating these days affects what my daughter is going to eat for the first few years of her life - and therefore for her entire life. If I eat every green thing in the produce aisle while I'm pregnant, she probably won't turn her nose up at the green mush called "peas" that comes out of those adorable baby food jars. If I eat cheese enchiladas (yum!) every day for the next 97 days, then she'll probably choose Guapo's for her birthday dinner location every year of her life. It's crazy.

But let's be honest, a mom's (and dad's) affect on her child's food habits goes so much further than that. Food affects a huge portion of your life. It affects family values, nutrition, overall health, traditions. My mom was - and continues to be - Mom of the Century when it comes to food and everything that goes along with it. My brother and I grew up eating at home anywhere from 5-7 nights a week, every week, from birth right through high school. Family dinners were one of the most consistent things throughout my life - even during summer and winter vacations while I was in college - that I really don't know what growing up without them would have been like. Not only did we have family dinners that often, but we had really good family dinners that often. I remember a year or two ago looking in my mom's pantry and seeing her two shelves (two shelves!) of both cookbooks and binders full of recipes that she's used over the past 23+ years while she was raising us. She created this recipe collection, cooked the widest variety of yummyness you could imagine, all while homeschooling us (until I was 8, my brother 10) and then gradually transitioning to part-time, then full-time work when we moved to Maryland. I remember her doing Once A Month Cooking on Saturdays so that we had home-cooked meals every night even when life was crazy busy for her. On top of that, I can't remember a time that we weren't allowed to bring a friend home for dinner. Mama was always happy to feed an extra mouth.

I don't want to overlook my dad here - he cooked a lot too, grilling during the summer and making his "Texas" meals during the winter (like his famous Texas 5 way chili). We were rarely home alone with my dad overnight since my mom didn't have to travel for her work, but even when we were, we ate healthily and well. He never minded cooking when my mom needed help, and I remember him doing the dishes for her many a night - the cook didn't always have to clean in our house!

What has all this meant to me? Lots of things I took for granted when I was a kid, I'm sure. As an adult, it means that I love cooking and I understand how to prepare a healthy meal. Our table is almost always set with whole grains, green, fiber filled vegetables, lean meats, and fresh fruits. (Though my mom also taught me how to bake like an expert, so I'm still taking advantage of our metabolisms by making sweets frequently. Chris appreciates that.) It means that tonight I get to make one of my Great Grandma's recipes because my mom used to make it all the time when I was a kid and passed it down. It means that I'm looking forward to cooking 6 nights a week for my family my entire life, and that I'm excited about Sunday night pizza night (the one night we were allowed to watch TV with dinner was Sunday, when we ordered pizza out and watched the Disney movie on ABC Family.) I understand that cooking takes creativity, meal planning and that its worth it to spend a bit more money on groceries if you're eating healthy. And it means that I haven't gained more than my allotted 35 pounds in the past 6 months of pregnancy, because I enjoy eating healthily - with an occasional double cheeseburger from McDonald's on the side.

So thank you Mumsy, for your wonderful example, for all your hard work and planning and all the hours upon hours you spent looking up recipes and then making them all through my life. It was no small thing. It matters. Its made a huge difference in my life, and its going to make a huge difference in my children's lives.

I have good friends

The decision to have children is arguably one of the most difficult decisions that Chris and I are ever going to make as a couple - it's certainly up there in the top five. This is one decision that you make while completely walking in faith, because the list of unknowns when going into pregnancy and parenting could wallpaper one of the Kardashian mansions from floor to ceiling. How will we afford ____ if we have a kid now? What if our baby has health problems? How will we manage work and childcare at the same time? What if we aren't as ready for this as we think we are? What if, what if, what if.... how will we, how will we, how will we.... It's like a broken record mantra providing the soundtrack to my life these days. (Intermixed with random Christmas carol lyrics that I can't get out of my head.)

I don't think its necessary to go into how Chris and I made the decision of baby? yes. now? yes! We couldn't have done it without our faith and trust in the Lord - end of story. But that's not the point of this post. The point of this post is to thank quite a few women in my life who have made it a point to sacrifice much of their time to talk to me, listen to me, calm me down and help me throughout the last 25 weeks. I've interrogated some of you about every weird feeling I've felt, every worry I've had, and I've even dragged one or two of you to the store with me to show me the good, the bad and the wildly unnecessary of baby registries. More than your sacrifice of time and patience, though, I want to thank you ladies for - without fail - encouraging me in Chris' and my decision. Telling me that yes, life is going to be different in three months. Yes, it's going to introduce me to a whole new realm of difficulties. Confirming that, no, I don't have any idea what I'm getting into, not really. But telling me over and over again, without hesitation, that it is 110% worth it. Really, I don't think its possible to comprehend how much of a gift you ladies have been to me.

On that note... I would like to make a gentle request of any readers out there. When you find out that a girlfriend/coworker/sister/female of any association with you is pregnant, please be careful with what you focus on while talking to them about being a mom - the good, the bad, or the ugly. Don't sugarcoat the realities, or lie about the difficulties, but please please please do not take every opportunity to tell her that her life is over or that you hope she doesn't regret this decision  in a couple of years. Fact of the matter is that, except by some act of God, that woman is going to be a mom in approximately 9 months, and focusing on the negatives is only going to make those 9 months miserable, not change the fact that mommyhood approaches. Instead, choose to build her up in hope, good sense, and the understanding that she does not need every item on the suggested registry list at Babies 'R' Us.

behold. children are a gift of the LORD, 

the fruit of the womb is a reward... {psalm 127:3}

every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down
from the father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change {james 1:17}